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How To Deal With A Moody Child

Right now I have one very moody child. It is school holidays and the kids are nagging me to go on the computer. That is fine, only there are four of them and only one computer. Not only that, but I need my computer for my work each day. Nevertheless the children are bombarding me for a turn on the computer.

I wish I had more than one computer in the house but I don't. Actually, I am in the process of buying one right now but the kids will just have to wait for a few more weeks. Not happy!

I had left the three boys to sort themselves out today and organise who would go on when. I gave them plenty of time, but when I finally gave them the five minute warning it was, "oh, he got more time than me. I didn't get a proper turn. It's not fair. I'm going on and you can't stop me".

It kind of made me wish that I hadn't bothered giving them a turn as they seemed to turn it all around and throw it back on me. Everyone seemed to end up angry with me. Now go figure! I let them use my computer, even though I really needed it for myself and to show their appreciation the kids all end up angry with me.

Actually, right now I only have one son angry with me. He has been in his bedroom sulking for twenty minutes or so. He came out once, stormed over to his brother, picked up a washing basket full of clothes that his brother had just bought in off the line, and threw the washing all over the floor before storming back into his bedroom. Hmmm... what to do about that??

I gave him a few minutes then went into his bedroom to see if he wanted to talk. Again I was met with arguing and non-compliance so I retreated knowing that he wasn't prepared to talk about anything. I went back to my room and logged onto the computer to write my daily article and realised that I had a great case study right infront of me. So I started writing about Kieren and his little fiasco.

A few minutes past and Kieren came into the bedroom and said to me, "Mum, tell me when you get off the computer because I want to go on". Then he walked away again. This is highly unusual for Kieren to act in this way, nevertheless he needn't think that he can get away with this kind of behavior.

I am not going to go chasing him again to tell him that he has a consequence. But when he comes to me again tonight (and believe me, he will), I shall say to him, "you will not be going on the computer tonight because of your inappropriate behavior".

I cannot force him to be happy about not getting a longer go (yes, he did get a go, he just wasn't happy with the length of the go). All I can do as the parent is enforce the right consequence for the behavior. And that is the key to managing a child's behvaior. Be consistent with your consequences.

If a child is naughty they require a consequence in order to learn from it. You are actually doing them a favour when you discipline them. I know they don't always appreciate it at the time. But later on in life they will thank you for it, you can be sure of that.

So, unfortunately Kieren has cooked his goose tonight. The silly thing is, if he had handled things differently the outcome would have been different. Now he must suffer in order to realise that his behavior was not acceptable in my household. And hopefully that will never happen again. If it was to happen again, the consequence would have to be bigger to show him that I mean business.

Parents, be inspired in your parenting and know that when you give your child a consequece you are doing them a huge favour.

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Kim Patrick is a single mum with four children who lives on the Sunshine Coast in Queensland, Australia. She is author of the book, "Get Your Child To Behave In 30 Days Or Less". For more information on how to get your child to behave, you can go to www.mychildcanbehave.com/main.html

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